Day 13

I wake up in the mornings with this slight resistance to face the day and I'm discovering that resistance is like giving birth. Although, I haven't given birth, but it sure feels that way. You know the baby is coming and there's nothing you can do to stop it. But you're trying to hold it back for as long as possible because you're not ready for this thing bigger than you to break you open. But once you relax and surrender to what's about to come, there's a release. And even if you don't surrender, the body will break you open anyway, but it will be that much more painful. So, the moral of the story is do we want to go about life the easy way or the hard way because either way it's already happening.

The Practice

Morning meditation - 30 minutes

Reflection

I went back to my mediation bench. It still seems to be the more grounding position for me at this time.

There's a different quality to meditating in the mornings vs. afternoons vs. evenings. Varying the times of the day that I practice helps to see where the mind is at which point of the day. Mornings tend to be more about planning. Afternoons tend to switch to worrying. Evenings lean more towards relationships.

It's the nature of the mind to try and sort things out. It never really does. It just gives you additional scenarios of how the same problem can be adjusted. But the problem is not meant to be adjusted, but rather seen for what it is. Once it is seen, you realize there is no problem, and then you know what you have to do, if anything.

Then why do we get stuck on these so called problems?

The way I see it, it's because we don't breathe through them. The moment I ask myself where is my breath at this moment, my awareness suddenly broadens, I can hear the sounds outside and not just the thoughts in my head, and then these thoughts start to sound very faint in comparison.