Day 19

"The only thing that will move you (and I don't mean to be poetic about this) is the same thing that moves a leaf hanging from a tree. It's simply because the breeze blows that way. So you always know what to do: the breeze blows that way, and that's the way you go." - Adyashanti

I spent Labor Day helping a friend with her house. I could've gone in many different directions, but I was moved to be there and do that. We don't know why we want to do certain things, but the mind tries to box it and then put a label on that box. It keeps compiling and piling up these boxes until the room is so full of them that there is no space to walk or breathe. The wind can't get through and move us in the direction that it wants because it's blocked by all those boxes. Once enough boxes are removed, then the wind can come in and swipe the rest of them out. Our goal of no goal is to make just enough space in our heads to for the breeze to come in, the rest will take care of itself.

The Practice

Morning meditation - 30 minutes
Morning yoga at the park - 1 hour

Reflection

The idea of "trying to get somewhere" is lessening. There's more energy in me that moves me by itself  versus the gut-wrenching thoughts:  "I have to do this today or what am I going to do today?"

The nature of my job as a substitute teacher inherently contains the element of surprise. I don't know whether I'm going to be working that day. On one side, this "not knowing" creates a certain amount of anxiety. On the other side, it's an opportunity to allow the wind to blow where it may. This summer has been a lesson in becoming comfortable with what may come. I began meditating consistently mid-summer and it has eased that side of anxiety to a great degree. Regardless, of what our jobs are and how busy we are, we're all hanging off of trees not knowing when the strong wind will come in and knock us off of it. And it will, eventually. No leaf hangs on forever. The point of life is not to hang on as tightly as we can, we can't no matter how hard we try anyway, so why not let go now and see where the wind will carry us.